specialzone | aren't incapability and mourning simply things you want to fear?

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aren't incapability and mourning simply things you want to fear?

[ Shadow was in the lobby once more, the scent of onion rings still present despite the party having been cleaned up. He was staring at a single warp ring... he'd eliminated all possibilities, this had to be the one. Having spent days trying to figure out if the ARK was actually possible to reach here...

He'd had no problem getting to it back in the real world, after all, he had the Doctor to thank for that. But this was a different place... and he couldn't be sure if the ARK in this realm would be the same as the one he knew before...

Would it still be empty and cold?

Or would it be like the home he once knew? Shadow frowned, shaking his head. It didn't matter what it was like, it could never be how it used to-- especially without the people there that made it familiar, warm. ]

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[Every detail, every sight and sound, every word, Sonic fixed his attention on all of it. His mind was often too quick for him, where at the mention of one thing, his mind sprung and scattered into so many different directions, wondering where to go next. But Sonic was learning to focus, and committed as much as he could to memory.

When Shadow pointed out the lights, he pictured them on and the alarm blaring. When Shadow mentioned each room in particular, he pictured what they were like, piecing together what he could from his own memory with the scenes in front of him.

He smiled slightly, thinking of the name and looking to the last room that Shadow had pointed out.]

... Cool.

[He had opened his eyes, breathed, and experienced life for the first time right here.]

Are you gonna go inside?

[ Shadow looked at Sonic and shrugged. ]

There wouldn't be a point to it. I was born there, but it didn't hold any special meaning to me. I was kept separate from the other research subjects.

[ He'd been a little lonely; talking to the professor from inside a test tube hadn't been the most glorious of things. Even then, the professor had only been analyzing his charts, mostly talking to himself, but Shadow, though unborn at the time, had been listening. As an unborn child listens to its mother's voice, Shadow listened to the voices of his creators. ]

A child never returns to its mother's womb; I have no reason to return to that place. If you want to see it, be my guest.

[Hearing how Shadow described his home was so different than how he had heard anyone else speak about their home or a place that was important to them. Home was somewhere to be revered, like a safe haven or sanctuary to return to or retreat to when necessary. But Shadow had been created instead, which had set him apart from other living beings. Sonic never really liked to think about it in those terms, preferring when Shadow said he was "born" instead.

Sonic glanced over to the room again. His curiosity had been piqued though. He didn't know much about science or all the details of all of the research that had taken place here. How had Shadow come into existence at all?]

... If it's okay with you, then yeah, I do want to see it.

[He had the door opened, although he didn't step inside, only looking at it from the outside. It didn't feel right. Shadow knew the space station best, and Sonic didn't want to go anywhere without what seemed like his permission, though had given it already.]

Edited 2011-06-27 01:34 (UTC)

[ Shadow watched Sonic stand at the doorway and sighed. ]

Are you just going to stand there? [ Walking past the blue hedgehog, Shadow entered into the room. It was decent sized, a testing tube on the left side of the area. There were computers and monitors filling that part of the room. The tube was empty and pristine. On the right side of the room there were some stuffed animals, a few pillows and some story books.

Shadow walked to another window which allowed one to view the Earth again. This room seemed to have a similar view to the observation deck, but this time from the right, which meant anyone who stood here could see what capsules were being ejected. ]

[That was better. Sonic followed Shadow's lead into the room, looking around at the nursery, as it had been so named. He headed over to the window to look down at the Earth once more, now at a different angle and view, the cloud and land formations around it slightly altered than from the other deck.

He had also noticed something that seemed out of place. The stuffed animals and pillows and books. A typical lab wouldn't hold such items, but then, this wasn't a typical lab. Whose were they? Sonic could take a guess. The items did lend themselves to making the lab that much more like a home instead of just a mere birthplace of various projects and, well, Shadow too.]

So it all started here.

[ Shadow nodded. ]

For better or for worse.

[ After all, his birth meant the destruction of the ARK... It wasn't his fault, but he felt responsible inevitably. He looked over at the toys, slowly stepping into the area they were lying in. ]

... [ He looked down at the books, memories streaming through his mind. He let out a sigh and turned away. ]

Is that all?

[It had started here, with Shadow coming to life, like the pieces had fallen together perfectly on the timeline, in line with fate. He hadn't been born any earlier or later and hadn't taken on any other form.

And why was he a hedgehog at all? All of their bickering and arguing over who was the faker was so... It was pointless now. None of them knew of each other's existences, and how could they due to the way time had worked. Neither of them had asked to be born as hedgehogs. Not that Sonic wasn't extremely proud to be one now, but he had no choice from the very start. Neither had Shadow. It was strange to think that their relationship may have been so radically different had time or fate changed one single detail or event.

Seeing Shadow near the toys, Sonic walked over there as well. The pillows and stuffed animals were cute, soft and warm compared to the hard, cold lab and electronics around them. But the books... Those had pictures and stories. Information. Either fantasy, fuel for the imagination, or fact. Was that why Shadow had also taken such a liking to the library besides the pure pursuit of knowledge?]

It shouldn't just be my decision, y'know. We're here for you, aren't we?

I didn't intend to come back in here.

[ Shadow picked up one of the books. It was Children's Literature... It obviously belonged to Maria, and Shadow flipped open the book. It was called "Winter Bear". Each page had a picture with some words to go with it. Shadow remembered... his first day out of the test tube, after he'd been shown around the ARK, he met Maria.

She insisted that they read and play together. There were barely any kids on the ARK her age. She showed Shadow the books that the Professor read to her when she was very young... "Winter Bear" was her favorite.

Shadow closed the book and put it back down carefully, gently. ]

There's too much.

[All was quiet, save for Shadow's movements and the gentle turning of pages. Sonic knew that for that single moment he should blend into the background, leaving Shadow to his memories without the blue hedgehog there to interfere or ruin them. As much as Sonic had insisted that Shadow move forward, as he said before, he didn't want Shadow to forget his past. There were good memories in there along with not so good ones, and it was inevitable. There had to be the not so good ones to make the good ones that much more precious.

Once Shadow spoke again, Sonic nodded, understanding, or understanding as much as he could. It couldn't have been easy, and Sonic had been the one to let his curiosity get the better of him. He spoke quietly, and though he hadn't said it in the exact words, there was an apology somewhere in his voice.]

... Okay. We should go then.

[ Shadow wasted no time in exiting the nursery, instead he began to head back to the observation deck. He knew the ARK better than anyone currently alive, he could drive it into the Earth if he wanted to, but that goal no longer remained.

Now just sadness lingered.

Perhaps it was time to leave the ARK, to look at other places, to get away from these memories and find something worth living for. He had to acknowledge that he wasn't going to die any time soon. Maria wouldn't have wanted him to waste his life. No matter how long it would end up being, even he didn't know.

Shadow proceeded over to the monitor on the observation deck, entering a few commands. The ARK began to make a check on different units throughout the facility. Weapons, guard services, air check, Chaos Drives... Everything was in working order, without a single bloodstain. He wondered, briefly, if this was the ARK as it was 50 years ago, except without anyone onboard.

If this place could bring people from different times... then why not objects? Places? Theoretically, it was all possible. ]

[Perhaps Shadow leaving as quickly as he did was almost symbolic. He wanted to leave it behind or even... throw it all away, so to speak. And yet there it would be, constantly following him and something he couldn't shake off. But that was just it too. No, he couldn't forget and shouldn't. He had to lead the way and look ahead, not let it hold him back.

The sound of the machines working, processing commands, displaying numbers and symbols and statistics signaled activity, but it wasn't life. It wasn't alive. It's also what made being in the space station that much more empty or inhospitable now since... it used to be. It used to hold life, contain life, be full of life and even create life.

Sonic stood next to the black hedgehog, again his eyes looking out over the Earth.]

I said I wouldn't let you do this alone, so I'm not.

What're you thinking about? ... If you need to leave, then we should.

That sounds like a good idea; I'm tired of this place. [ No doubt Shadow would come back here in order to do his thinking, but he didn't want to spend anymore time here. Wasting away in memories... There wasn't any point to it.

It was just another form of decay. He turned to Sonic after shutting down the monitor and offered his hand. ]

I suppose thanks are in order.

You got it. Let's go somewhere else then.

[Sonic nodded at Shadow's response. His darker counterpart had experienced enough here for now. If he needed to return, then Sonic was more than willing to join him, but would respect his decision if he needed to have time to himself as well.

The blue hedgehog had turned and saw Shadow offer his hand. He extended his hand out too to place it in Shadow's.]

Hey, you don't hafta thank me, really. I wanted to help, and I'm not askin' for anything in return.

[ Shadow's grip was firm, and he didn't bother shaking the other's hand. After a moment, he released his grip and turned to where they had appeared. There was a warp ring waiting for them.

Without hesitation, the hedgehog leapt through it, landing back inside the lobby. His intent on exploration replaced his need for verifying the past. Perhaps it was better this way. ]

[Whenever Sonic went anywhere, it was always to go straight there, looking forward. But this time, after Shadow leaped through the warp ring, Sonic took a look back at the space colony they were leaving behind for the time being.

...

He didn't want to keep Shadow waiting, so he also jumped into the warp ring and appeared back inside the lobby.]

[ Shadow watched Sonic pop out of the ring, eying him. ]

If you want to come back here, you won't have to wait for me. I don't control who goes in or who comes out. If I don't satisfy your curiousity of the ARK, you can do it on your own.

[Sonic nodded once more, now not looking back at the warp ring he had just exited from.]

Yeah, I know, but I think I'm good for now. It's still gonna be there if I ever do want to go back. Or if you want to too.

Are you gonna be okay?

[ Shadow shook his head. ]

It will take more than a trip down memory lane to render me useless. [ But he was feeling tired after that. He felt like thanking Sonic again, but wasn't exactly sure how to say it... But he was tired now, and desired a rest. ]

Don't follow me this time. [ It sounded worse than he meant for it to, but he was honest. He wanted to be alone, and perhaps sleep if he needed to. ]

I know, you don't have to tell me twice.

[It might not have rendered him useless, but it clearly had affected the black hedgehog in some way. But there wasn't a need to say that as they were both well aware of it. The black hedgehog did have his pride, after all. Had it been reversed, Sonic would have thought the same way.]

Heh, I won't. You go do your thing. See ya 'round, Shadow.

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